Spicy Candy Showdown

– Today, we determine the
spiciest candy of them all. – Let’s talk about that. (upbeat music) – Good mythical morning! – Mythical beasts, as you
know, every January 17th, we like to give you a great show. And today, it happens to be– – [Rhett And Link] January 17th! – 2018, so I guess we’re
about to do that right now, give you a great show. We’re gonna be boiling your favorite songs down to their essence. We’re also gonna be trying to figure out the weird things people Google with comedian Esther Povitsky. – But first, mirror, mirror on the wall, which is the spiciest candy of them all? It’s time for Super Snack Death
Match, spicy candy edition. – Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do. We’re gonna taste six
different spicy snacks, and we’re gonna rank them
on our scale of spicy. We got spicy, spicier,
spiciest, spiciester, and spiciestriest, spicieriest, and then instant death mouth. – What? – Instant mouth death. You know what I’m trying to say. – A mouth is gonna die. That’s all I know. (rock music) Our first candy is
Sonoran Spice\ Company’s Ghost Pepper Fire Dust. Oh, man. I’ve always wanted my dust to be spicy. – What is this spicy dust used for? Is it like a weapon? Is it like a diversion
tactic for a mugger? – [Link] I don’t know, but
it will cause eye irritation, and it’s not for children. – Hey. – It says that on the back. – We’re not children. – So I’m not gonna open this. I’m gonna place this on the ranking board. Instead, we’ve got a little– – What do you wanna do? You wanna do a finger lick and dip? – Well, I wanna use my own finger. – You don’t wanna use my finger? I have, I’ve got 10 of them. – (laughs) You had to think for, you’re like, I got– – That’s why in the
world, we count in 10s, because we’ve got 10 fingers. – No more stalling. – Okay. – All right. – Lick and dip. Lick and dip. We can do a whole new line of
products with lick and dip. – Lick it. – [Rhett And Link] And dip it. – [Rhett] Of course, we’re
going to eat a lot of dust. – How much dust do you have? – A dusting. – Look how much my finger’s shaking. That’s not on purpose. – Here we go. – Sweet. Oh. – Don’t breathe in. Sweet and spicy. – It was sweet, and now it’s spicy. – Oh, crap, that is not unspicy. – We do not have a good relationship with mister ghost pepper. You’re already drinking some milk? Now because we have
nothing to compare it to, man, it’s hot, and it’s
burning down my throat. What I wanted to do was taste it but not actually ingest
any of these things. – I swallowed it. – I swallowed it too,
and I didn’t want to. You wanna go ahead and
put this at the top? – Well, we got nothing to compare it to. I don’t know what to do. Put it in the middle. – I’ll put it at the top. We can shove it down if
something gets hotter. – But I didn’t have instant mouth death. – No, I didn’t either. (hiccups) Oh, there come the hiccups. (audience laughs) – Hiccups are not referenced on the scale. (rock music) Okay, now we’ve got the Toe of Satan from The Flamethrower Candy Company. – I’ve heard this phrase
before, the toe of Satan. – Yeah, interesting story, Link. The makers of this candy
(Link hiccups) are fans of Good Mythical Morning. That’s the show we’re making right now. And there was a time when we
were eating a ghost pepper, and I bit into it and I said feels like I’ve bitten the toe of Satan. And that gave them the bright idea to create a whole sucker line. – Now I’m looking all
over this and I don’t see any mention of you, me,
or Good Mythical Morning. – Well, but they did mention it– – Maybe it’s on the
inside of the packaging. – On the internet. I did see it mentioned on the internet. Let’s not have sour grapes, Link. Is that how that saying goes? – I’d much rather be eating
a sour grape right now, but here we go with the Toe of Satan. – Do you have sour grapes,
or do you give them? – I will acknowledge that there– – Or be them? – There is a Toe of Satan challenge where you keep this in your
mouth for five minutes. – We’re not doing that. – Because we just wanna get enough to know relatively how hot it is. – So what do you wanna do? You just wanna insert,
just insert and uninsert? Insert and then out-sert. – Yeah, I’m gonna put the toenail down. – Toenail down, insert, out-sert. What are you gonna do once inserted? Insert– – Insert, say, “Mm-hmm.” – Mm-hmm, and out-sert. – Insert, mm-hmm. – [Rhett And Link] Out-sert. – Dink it. – Dink it. – Insert. – [Rhett And Link] Mm-hmm. – Cinnamony. – Oh! – We didn’t even leave it in. I shouldn’t have touched
it to the roof of my mouth. – I touched it to multiple
parts of my mouth. – I touched it to every part of my mouth. – I touched it to the floor
and the roof of my mouth, and the walls. – Now we just took it in and put it out. And on their own scale,
that makes us a coward, somewhere between a coward and a wimp. – Yeah, I’ll take that. – Whatever. All we know is that it’s very hot. – It’s hotter than the dust, is it not? – Abso-freaking-lutely. Instant mouth death if you
continue to suck on this sucker. (rock music) Next up, we’ve got the
Cinnamon Zombee Candy. Man, even when I talk, it gets hotter from
the freaking Satan toe. And this one seems scary to me because it’s made with
a combination of ghost, Trinidad scorpion, and
Carolina reaper peppers. – Our three mortal enemies. – We have had bad, bad times with all three of these puppies. – It’s really the Trinidad
that was the worst for me. – This is hard candy. So it’s implied that
you’re supposed to put this in your mouth and such on it too. I don’t wanna touch it, so I’m gonna– – You’re gonna spoon hard
candy into your mouth? – I’m gonna spoon hard candy into my mouth like an old man who knows what he likes. – Well, I’m not gonna let
you do that alone. (chuckles) – So I got one because I touch my face, I touch my nose, I touch my glasses. – That’s really a great way to get sick. Don’t touch your face. Just stop touching your face. – Or other people’s faces. Stop touching other people’s faces if that’s a habit you have.
– Stop touching everything. Stop touching yourself
and everything else. – So dink it, insert, mm-hmm. – Out-sert. – And then you spit it out. – Out-sert. – [Rhett And Link] Dink it. – Insert. – [Rhett And Link] Mm-hmm. – Ugh! You know what, I know the
taste of Carolina reaper. I can certify that it’s
in there ’cause it has– – [Rhett And Link] A death taste. (audience laughs) – It really does. – There’s also a sweetness, which helps. – I’ve never tasted death directly. – It’s not as bad as the toe, dude. – It actually has a sweetness to it. – [Link] Yeah. – I kinda like it. It’s not that bad. – I feel nauseous because
of my previous experiences with Carolina reaper and
Trinidad scorpion but– – And I don’t know what it would be like to suck on this thing, you know, for an extended period of time. – But it can’t be worse than– – It is definitely not even getting close to the Toe of Satan. – I don’t think this is bad as the dust. – No, this is not as hot as the dust. I agree. – It’s still nasty. (rock music) – Okay, now we’ve got some
cinnamon-flavored gumballs from the Sonoran Spice
Company, ghost pepper gumballs. Now this is the same
company that made the dust. You think they put their
dust on their balls? – Yeah, they dust their balls. – Yeah. Any company that doesn’t dust their balls, I don’t invest in them. – Oh, man. You don’t have to open it,
Rhett, I have it right here. – Oh, sorry. – You put food in front of Rhett, he’s gonna instinctively
start opening and eating it. – Yeah, that’s what you’re supposed to do. – Even if it’s this. – So this is a gumball, so I feel like– – I don’t know.
– The only way to judge it is to insert, chew– – Blow a bubble. – Oh, no. (audience chuckles) And out-sert. Now are you gonna require
a spoon for this too? – Yeah, that’s a good idea. – If a man is spooning
balls into his mouth, you know he’s at the end of the line. – You’re biting this? – Yeah, if you wanna– – How many chews? – Four. – Four chews.
– Three. Four chews. – Ugh. – One. – Two, three, four. Oh, it’s not bad. I’m gonna keep chewing. – Yeah, me too. – It’s got a sourness to it. – I’m so scared. – Wait for it. – Okay, here it comes. – I’m getting a lot of (mumbles). – Okay, here it comes. – I just swallowed a bunch of saliva. I didn’t wanna do that. – Okay, I’m gonna out-sert. I’m leaving that on the spoon
(Link gags) so we continue to analyze it. You okay over there? – Hot stuff makes me gag because
it’s never made me happy. – It’s a Pavlovian thing. – Yeah. – [Rhett] This isn’t that hot. – It’s not that bad. This is the first candy that I
can still taste that it’s gum or that it’s supposed to
be a certain type of candy. In this case, gum. – I feel like it’s on the Zombee scale. – Yeah. I don’t think it’s as hot. – Sorry I messed the packaging up. It really would have been a lot prettier. (rock music) – This is the world’s
hottest chocolate bar, but does that make it the
world’s hottest candy? There’s only four grams
of chocolate in this bar. – [Rhett] It looks so innocent. – The gold inlays, it looks real fancy. – It doesn’t have like all
the signs of this is so hot. Like it doesn’t have like a donkey on it. – Right. – You know, like because
any kind of hot sauce that’s got a donkey on
it, you know that’s hot. – But they have perforated it into three, six, nine, 12 little squares. – Let’s take that as a, I’m sure we can probably just pop it in. – You pop it in. I’ll take one little square. – No, I’m saying I’m gonna
take one little square because I’m taking the
manufacturer’s guideline seriously. – Yeah, it’s like a dosage. You’re touching it, dude. – I don’t touch my face. I have a hair barrier. I touch my beard. It’s not really touching my face. – [Link] I’m gonna get a good one here. – [Rhett] That’s a nice square. – Okay, I mean it’s chocolate. – So this is a full digestion situation. – Just chew it up. – Chew it up and swallow it. – Yeah. – Just like food. – Yeah, like eat it. Three, two, one. Chocolate right off the bat. – Oh. – No. It’s like I’m tasting burnt. My burnt– – Oh! – My burnt self. – Oh! – Oh, you shouldn’t have swallowed it. – Here they come. – It’s really, this is
really freaking hot. (Rhett burps) This is like sickening hot. – What, how– – I don’t know what– – What do they do (hiccups)– – It doesn’t freaking say anything on it. Why are you drinking milk? – Because I know it’s hot. – You gotta taste it. – I’m putting ice on my mouth. (Link gags) What in the world (hiccups) happened? – I don’t know. I don’t know what they did,
but guys, this is so hot. I don’t even know any of what I said. – I swallowed it so fast. I was like, “It’s chocolate. “I’ll just eat it.” I ate is so fast. Is your throat burning? – Mm-hmm. – Dude, (hiccups) this is… (audience laughs) – Instant mouth death. – Oh, gosh! – Instant mouth death. – It’s so wrong. (Link hiccups) It feels the way I feel after
I eat a pepper straight up. (Link spits) Ugh, ugh, yeah. – Can you gargle milk? – Help us put these back
out there so we know what’s going on, but we definitely
know that is the hottest. We got one more though. (rock music) – We got one more.
(Link spits) Carolina reaper-flavored– – Carolina reaper? – Cinnamon hard candy from
the Chili Head Spice Company. See, it’s got triple X on it. – [Link] Oh, no. – [Rhett] That could
mean a couple of things. – Let’s get it over with. – If it is not the one thing that you’re already thinking
about, it means hot! They give you a warning. They don’t give it to you in this thing that makes it look like
it’s fit for a queen. (audience laughs) (Link spits) – I’m in so much pain. – It does say hellfire-infused
milk chocolate. We should have read it. – From the chocolate, I just
wanna get this over with. Here, just take one and put
it in your freaking mouth. Ugh, I don’t even wanna
dink, sink, or nothing. – I already ate it. It feels like ice. – Nothing. – Yeah. – Nothing new. – Like a gummy bear. – No, I’m gonna spit it out. – Yeah, I am gonna do that. (audience laughs)
(Link spits) – Ugh. – But it actually cooled my mouth down just to give you an idea. – I’m incapable of knowing
where this goes on here. – It’s like you got the
speech jammer on now. – But I think, I did taste the hotness
of this come through. I think it’s hotter than these two. – [Rhett] Really? – Yeah, that’s what I’m proposing. – I feel like this part of
the scale is not trustworthy. – Yeah. – I feel like the only
thing that’s trustworthy is that this is the hottest
candy available on the market. – After tasting this, I
did taste hotness in here, so that’s why I’m putting it here. Ugh, ugh. And I’m not happy about
it, but if you’re curious what the hottest candy is, now you know. I don’t expect to be tasting anything, even though I’m gonna be
eating stuff for the next week. – Or the rest of your life. Keep watching to see us
sing shorter versions of your favorite songs
in Cliff Notes Songs. – After we recover. You earned yourself a
mythical merit badge or two, so get them at mythical.store.

David Anderson

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